Hey, TV's Nick McGee here for Friendly Fire. I'm a big fan of war. If you've seen me in Fuck the Nazis and Fuck the Nazis 2, this comes as no surprise, and the history of Friendly Fire is simply fascinating. From their humble beginnings selling revolvers out of the trunks of their cars, the patriots behind Friendly Fire have always had one goal in mind: arm the world. Throughout history, wars, civil unrest, jihads, coup d'état, or today's gang warfare, no matter who wins, Friendly Fire's there to pick the loser up, dust them off, and sell 'em a larger weapon. From the largest army to the individual gang member, Friendly Fire has the firepower you need. Their motto has never been more true than it is today: "Friendly Fire, coz it's fuckin' crazy out there!"
— Friendly Fire commercial #1
Hey, TV's Nick McGee here for Friendly Fire. Those of you who've watched me on Rape Squad, every Wednesday at 9 on Channel 6, know that I'm not comfortable unless I have a .44 Shepherd in my hand. And since this town's a Wild West show, you need to be packin' too. Here at Friendly Fire, they've got VICE 9s, T3K Urbans, AR-40 Xtnds, all the firepower you need with no frills and no waiting. You come in, you pick out your hardware, and we take your cash; no background checks, no waiting periods. Let's face it, this town's gone to hell. But you don't have to. When there's a bomber about or a car on a rampage or a hooker that loses it, you need the stopping power of a[sic]SKR-7 Spree or an AS12 Riot. When the shit's goin' down, you don't wanna be stuck with just your dick in your hand. Man up at Friendly Fire, coz it's fuckin' crazy out there!
— Friendly Fire commercial #2
Hey, TV's Nick McGee here for Friendly Fire. You've seen me on the big screen in Throat Punch and Throat Punch 2, out now on DVD, but I've got even better news: Friendly Fire is pricing all their weapons for one day only at 15% off their already low military discount prices. So, you can buy 15% more firepower for the same amount of cash, or you can pick up K6 Krukovs, NR4s, and McManus firepower at 15% off. Listen to this Tombstone... Sweet. And it's 15% off at Friendly Fire. One day only sale. Man up at Friendly Fire, coz it's fuckin' crazy out there!
— Friendly Fire commercial #3 (15% discount)
Hey, TV's Nick McGee here for Friendly Fire. Those of you who've seen me in Rear Naked Choke, you know that my forearms are deadly weapons, but it's always good to have backup. Hear that? That's the sound of a .44 Shepherd's cylinder, the finest revolver ever created. And this... well, that's the sweet chamber action of the NR4, a pistol that fits in your hand like it was born there. And get this: you can purchase both of these weapons and everything else they sell at Friendly Fire at 25% off. One day only. Molotovs, Grenades, RPGs, Pipe Bombs, and other materia at 25% off. SKR-7 Sprees, T3K Urbans, and GDHC .50s: 25% off! Everything, and I mean everything, is 25% off at Friendly Fire. One day only sale. Man up at Friendly Fire, coz it's fuckin' crazy out there!
Nick again presents four commercials in Saints Row 2; two advertising Friendly Fire and two advertising Sloppy Seconds.
Narrator: "And now a special message from Friendly Fire." Nick McGee: "Hello friends, Nick McGee here and I'd like to take a few moments of your time to set the record straight about a topic that's very dear to me, something that affects all of us." Tommy: "Global warming?" Nick McGee: "Something much more important than that, Tommy. I'm talking about gun control." Tommy: "What's gun control, Mr. McGee?" Nick McGee: "Well Tommy, some misguided people on Capitol Hill think that waiting periods are needed for buying a rocket propelled grenade launcher." Tommy: "But Mommy says that without waiting periods, they'll be anarchy." Nick McGee: "Anarchy? No Tommy, your mother's afraid of freedom." Tommy: "But aren't guns dangerous?" Nick McGee: "[Laughs] To the unarmed or untrained, sure, but the same thing could be said about swing sets or Bengal tigers." Tommy: "Well, I'd never though about it like that before." Nick McGee: "Not many people have, Tommy. That's what we're trying to change." Tommy: "But what can I do, Mr. McGee?" Nick McGee: "This year, when your birthday rolls around, don't ask for a football or a toy car, ask your parents for an American-made .44 Shepherd." Tommy: "Aren't I too young to own a gun?" Nick McGee: "Tommy, you're never too young to start living." Tommy: "Yay!" Narrator: "This message brought to you by Friendly Fire."
— Friendly Fire commercial #1
Hello friends, I'm Nick McGee. As a Second Amendment advocate, I assert that with our right to carry firearms comes the responsibility of knowing how to handle them properly. Did you know that in Stilwater, seven out of ten muggings could have been prevented had the victim in question remembered to take off the safety on their weapon? When facing a criminal hopped up on drugs and desperation, not only do you need the conviction to pull that trigger, you need to make sure that hollow-point bullet shatters their spine. That's why it's so important to make sure any weapon you're carrying is always locked, loaded, and ready to fire. So next time you're walking home from a Feed Dogs concert, remember this: Safety first, safety off.
— Friendly Fire commercial #2
Hi, I'm Nick McGee, and I'd like to take a few seconds to talk to you about Sloppy Seconds. If you're like me, sometimes you can't afford to get something new, fresh, and unstained, but that doesn't mean you have to be left out. What's wrong with some sloppy seconds? Sure it's already been used by someone else, maybe you'll even get an odd look or two for wearing a shirt marked with blood and semen, but sometimes you have to take what you can get. So come on down to Sloppy Seconds, Stilwater's only source for all your second-hand clothing needs. If it looked good on them, it'll look great on you.
— Sloppy Seconds commercial #1
Nick McGee: "[Slurred] Hello again, it's your old friend Nick McGee." Director: "Ah shit, he's drunk again." Background male: "What do we do? I don't know what to do." Director: "Er, c-c-could you hold on, Nick?" Nick McGee: "For God's sake, it's a sales ad, how many reads do you need?" Director: "Well Nick—" Nick McGee: "There's a sale at Sloppy Seconds. There's a sale... at Sloppy Seconds. There's a sale at... Sloppy Seconds!" Director: "Nick, those are all great reads. Can I just get one more for safety?" Nick McGee: "Go to hell." Director: "Super..." Narrator: "Sloppy Seconds: it's where Nick McGee shops when he's not drunk."